Three days of some of the best music in the world, debauchery, and unforgettable moments is the best way to describe Chicago’s leading music festival. As Lollapalooza 2012 came to an end, Grant Park was left with piles of empty cans, broken cell phones, mud, and faded memories of what those three days held. Even the sporadic evacuation didn’t stop people from partying, as people took to spinning around in the streets as sheets of rain poured down on them. Lollapalooza is like a mystical world of sorts, where you will see and hear things that you would never see or hear anywhere else, but it’s all OK because it’s Lollapalooza. As a hardcore festie who gets down with the best of them, I am here to share some of what I thought were the best and worst sets and some of the beautiful weirdness I heard and saw during my amazing three days. 

Day 1: Friday

Best Surprisingly Good Set of the Day: It looks like the sun would be the top headliner of the day, considering it was out in full force transforming people into drunk Lolla zombies. As I made my way to Perry’s Stage to catch Zedd’s set, I saw panting people walking out of the crowd to escape the suns violent rays. Zedd was the surprise of the day, switching up his style, keeping the audience on their feet and jamming to his hard hitting electronic beats.

Fastest Fans Gained By a Set: Die Antwoord was one of my top priorities of the entire fest to go see; having never seen them live and being a huge fan, I couldn’t wait to see what they had in store. Creepy images of weird distorted faces began to play on the two screens by the stage and my excitement grew. Then, huge bass blared out of the speakers and DJ Hi Tek made his way to the decks with his signature prosthetic mask and a bright orange jump suit.

As he broke into “DJ Hi-Tek Rulez,” the people I was standing by look bewildered as “DJ Hi Tek will fok you in the ass” began to play. Everyone around my look confused and I got irritated, so I moved to the “fun crowd” in the front. Yo Landi and Ninja came out in bright orange jump suits and broke into “Fok Julle Naaiers,” and the confused people began to jam. The hardcore fans raged as these two put on a show that was literally amazing. Yo Landi’s high-pitched helium voice got the crowd going with her zef gangster attitude, and Ninja stripped down to his infamous Pink Floyd boxers to an overall ecstatic crowd.

Most Frequently Lost People That Everyone Was Looking For: Lucy and Molly.

Surprising Song Dedications at an EDM Set: If you know a little bit about Lorin Ashton, also known as Bassnectar, you know why he has been dubbed an EDM hippie. As mostly incoherent fans overflowed Perry’s listening to his bass-heavy beats, Bassnectar took to the mic to dedicate one of his songs to the victims in the Colorado shooting, then later on dedicated a song to all of the girls who look to media for their body image as pictures of Vogue magazine played on the screens. Nice sentiment, but slightly random.

Funniest Sentence I Heard All Day: A drunk frat boy runs in front of me while exiting Grant Park and says: “I think I might need the morning after pill, because I’ve been dancing like a slut!”  

Day 2: Saturday

Possibly the Best/Worst Thing to Ever Happen: I had arrived a little late on this day, only to catch the end of SALVA at Perry’s, and decided to sit in the shade for a bit to enjoy Star Slinger. A girl next to me asks if I have received a text about an evacuation. I hadn’t and she told me her friend said to evacuate now. Looking around, no one was leaving so I stayed there. Soon, waves of people were walking past, so my friend and I decided it was best to go. Before you know it, perplexed festies were piling out of Grant Park due to an extreme storm.

As people piled into the Congress Hotel and other surrounding establishments, sheets of monsoon-like rains fell to the ground. This evacuation/storm led to some Lolla memories I’ll never forget.

Funniest Sentence While Waiting for Storm to Pass: “Either the sidewalk is purple or the acid kicked in, bro.”

Most Daring Stunt Pulled: As thousands of people were piling to get back into Grant Park, a daring idiot/Lolla hero decided to climb a street light, break it, and jump into the crowd.

Muddiest Set: When everyone began to return back to Perry’s stage to catch Skream & Benga’s set, the discovery of a giant mudpit in the middle stopped people in their tracks. Some people didn’t hesitate to jump the water brown mess, but others looked it at it with horror. As Skream & Benga began and the bass filled up area, my friend and I looked at each other. “You go first,” she said. I was already gone, ankle deep in mud and raging for my life. At the end of their set, they dropped Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” and more people piled into the mud and went nuts.

Most Disappointing Set: With Calvin Harris being such a staple in the EDM scene, I was curious to see what he would be like. His set was pretty predictable as we went through his catalogue of radio hits, not really staying true to his roots. He ended up sounding like the mainstream radio late-night mix.

Most Impossibly-Crowded Set: Trying to make my way over to catch part of the Red Hot Chili Peppers was nearly impossible. Actually, it was impossible. You couldn’t even get close to the stage, and stairs were nearly impossible to see through the throbbing masses of people, therefore causing accidents. Well, at least I got to hear a part of “Under the Bridge.”  

Day 3: Sunday

Set Closest to Being the Zombie Apocalypse: Arriving to see Little Dragon’s set at Perry’s, I was immediately hit with a stench that was comparable to the Lincoln Park Zoo: the day’s previous mudpit had dried up slightly and now was an even grosser, goopier mass of who-knows-what. Even I wasn’t crazy enough to go in that. The sun was beaming harder than Friday and after three days of partying and drinking, people started to look like zombies. As Little Dragon’s Yukimi Nagano came out and sang with her jazzy voice and awesome live band, people swayed back and forth underneath the sun — staring straight ahead like something out of a horror movie. Most people were in the shade checking out the set, but the Lolla zombies stayed in the sun just swaying until her set ended and they snapped out of the trance.

Most Mythical Set: When Of Monsters and Men began to play, people jammed around flinging their hair and basking in the comforting tones of their infectious folk music. It seemed like something out of a fairy tale as people stood in between trees as the sunlight poked through, making the area glittery in some sense. I half-expected little woodland creatures to come out and start dancing with us. The only thing that ruined this moment was a drunk high school girl who was balling her eyes out screaming, “MY EX BOYFRIEND IS BEHIND US RIGHT NOW!” Way to embarrass yourself in front him.

Funniest Blow-Up Toy I Saw on a Stick: A giant penis.

Scariest Thing I Saw on a Stick: A plastic baby with a noose on its neck. Why?

Most Face-Melting DJ Set I’ve Ever Seen in Life: As excited patrons moved to see the veteran French electronic DJs at the headlining Bud Light stage, the anticipation began to grow to exponential levels. People had their eyes glued to the stage as they waited for Justice’s signature cross to light up. When the first sounds blared through the speakers, the cross illuminated and the party was on. Their set was high energy, completely unpredictable and theatrical. At one point, the cross opened up and Gaspard Auge walked over to where a virtual piano appeared, sitting in front of it and playing notes. It seemed like it rained electro while people danced their hearts out to the hits that we all know and love. It was truly an amazing experience.

Well, Lollapalooza is over and we are left with pictures, muddy clothes, and best of all the memories of a fun weekend that everyone who was involved got to experience together. Until next time, friends!

About The Author

Jessikah Smith was a contributing writer to Jonk Music in 2012.